He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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