wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
this hospital has no fireball
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
