I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Randomize
