If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize