you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
