But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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