i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I deserve this hangover.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize