And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Randomize