no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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