I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
whose parrot is this?
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Randomize
