Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize
