Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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