How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
