He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
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