You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Randomize
