So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
We are all done wearing pants today
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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