I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
