According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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