Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
