would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize