Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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