he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
