She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
