it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Reggie can tackle my bush.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
And then my night got REAL pukey
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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