Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
