You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
