this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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