Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I touched a dick in church today
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