He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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