i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
