No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize