Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
