then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
