well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize