You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Randomize
