Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
