Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
