I like to think it a success when the cops are called
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
