what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize
