the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
