it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
