I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
