Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
