you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
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