wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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