ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Randomize
