Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
That reminds me...we need to get swords
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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