would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
