I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
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