are you so shy because you have an std?
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
I have post one night stand depression
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
